We can do better!  We must do better!

I woke in the middle of the night!  My heart was heavy … I could not sleep!  So, I put the tea kettle on and I decided to catch up on my reading.

• I reread a draft of an article on Lessons Learned from Fallen Leaders.
• I read an email that had just come in – An Open Letter to Victims of Clergy Abuse! 
• I turned my attention to social media, where I read a flurry of social media posts criticizing leaders for their response to allegations of abuse. 
• I read of a series of incidences of abuse within the cheer industry.
• I read the results of the investigation into allegations against Ravi Zacharias.

As a person of faith, I find comfort in reading the Psalms and Proverbs – but even there I read of oppression, plagues, abuse, the burden of suffering due to poor choices, and the enemy pursuing his victim and overcoming him.  The folly of one’s ways. 

When I read, I am challenged … provoked to be better … to do more … to feel deeply about the hurts and pains of this world. 

Are you challenged when you read these accounts?  Or do you just shake your head and criticize the offenders. 

Is there anything that incites you and fuels your passion to do more, to be better yourself?

By Karine Devost

Source: with permission: https://telioslaw.com/blog/ten-ways-land-court-over-sexual-harassment

Harvey Weinstein, Matt Lauer, Al Franken—and the list goes on. High-profile sexual harassment allegations have shaken up Hollywood, the media, and politics. But don’t think that this trend is confined to celebrities. They are not the only ones who can, and do, abuse power. Sexual harassment by employees, if not dealt with swiftly, can create a toxic work environment as well as land even small organizations in hot water. In light of this timely topic, here are ten easy ways to end up in court over sexual harassment. Topics in this “what not to do” list are examples taken from actual cases. 

Before diving into this list, it is important to remember when organizations can be held legally liable for sexual harassment that happens to their employees. A key defense exists to sexual harassment liability for organizations, called the Faragher/Ellerth defense. In order to take advantage of this defense, an organization must prove “(a) that the employer exercised reasonable care to prevent and correct promptly any sexually harassing behavior, and (b) that the plaintiff employee unreasonably failed to take advantage of any preventative or corrective opportunities provided by the employer or to avoid harm otherwise.”1 With that in mind, let’s dive into the list, as many of these easy ways to fail are ways to lose this defense.

“Female karate teacher sends nude photos to 11-year-old student and invites him over to her house for sex.”

“Youth pastor accused of sending sexual texts to 15 year old.”

“Camp Director sends inappropriate snapchat messages to campers.”

“Teacher sentenced for texting student thousands of times.”

...

What if we taught kids to look at cyberbullying like this? What if we helped them see that the words, photos, actions and things they do online hurt just as much (if not more), than if they did it physically? What if we helped adults to see that their words and online actions are teaching our kids how to behave online? What if we could actually...

A conversation at a kitchen table:

Son: Mom, I don't want to play hockey anymore!

Dad: What are you talking about? You love hockey!

Son: I don't want to play anymore; it's no longer fun! 

Mom: Of course, you have fun!

Son: I don't want to go to any more tournaments!

Dad: You can't let your team down!

Son: I'm done!

Mom: Do you know how much money we have invested in your hockey! You can't quit now. You are headed to professionals. 

Son: I don't like the coach!

Dad: Don't talk about your coach like that! Do you know how much that man has done for you boys! You are one of his favourite players! You be thankful – and show him your gratitude! 

Can you not hear this conversation happening at dinner tables across North America! Certainly, as it relates to hockey, in hundreds of Canadian homes. 

“My middle school teacher molested me.

How is it possible for those words to be written?  One would think that a school teacher, trained to educate and care for children, would be the last person able to harm a child.  Het, this man sexually abused me for years, and not a single adult came to my rescue. 

Mr. Baker was a well-respected married man whom students loved, parents trusted, and the school awarded.  He spent two years grooming me – building up my trust, spending time listening to my problems, and showering me with much-needed attention I hadn’t received at home.  Mr. Baker was completely above suspicion that he would be capable of sexually abusing someone. 

Over the course of the next few weeks I am going to be highlighting some great books targeting different segments of our society where abuse is present, and unfortunately too rampant. 

According to Mary DeMuth, “Predators permeate every strata of society. My first abusers were Boy Scouts. This man? A doctor. They infiltrate trustworthy structures like organizations, sports, and, yes, even the church.”

If it is true that the sexual abuse crisis has permeated every corner of our world, including the church, we need a strategy to combat each strata.

How we respond to both its menacing proliferation and the shattered hearts of survivors is vital. God beckons us to be good Samaritans to those facing trauma and sexual brokenness in the aftermath of abuse, to provide safe places to heal in community. 

In the pages of her newest book, We Too, author and advocate Mary DeMuth encourages the church she loves to rise up and face the very real evil of sexual abuse and harassment--with candor and empathy. Based on current research and survivors' stories, along with a fierce fidelity to Scripture, DeMuth paints a realistic picture of the church's historical and present response to sexual violence, and she provides a framework of revival and surprising hope for the future.

When I was a young boy, I loved September. And it wasn’t because the leaves were changing colour or because of the crisp smells in the air. It was because the first Monday of October was near, and the first Monday of October was the opening of bird hunting season in Nova Scotia.

On that day, I knew my dad and I would take off from school...